ep, sleepy Part 2-My friend Brian's 2 cents

As I said before in a previous article, bands are in a real weird position when it comes to recording that first album or EP or whatever. My buddy Brian says that bands should go with a full length album first and THEN do the EP.

Here's the reasoning: let's call this the WHALE ALBUM and it's a full length. There's twelve songs on the whale album and two are great and three are good and maybe two are pretty good...and then there's the rest of the five songs. Well i'd say that's a pretty successful debut album: seven out of the twelve songs are at least pretty good. At that point, you only have to follow up with a five song EP with the same ratio of great/good/pretty good/crap and yet again, you'll have a pretty good album.

However...

Let's say the band wants to have the EP as their debut album. We'll call it the GUPPY ALBUM and they just record the 5 great and good songs mentioned above. What's the result? My God, every song on here is wonderful! Through and through it's just amazing. These guys/gals got something here! Why do they got something here? Well it's the ratio: all at least good songs, something found in maybe one out every five thousand albums (*ed. note: not scientifically proven*). People are throwing roses and crying and shooting off fireworks, making out in the streets.

And then of course bands think they have to follow up with the full length after their Guppy. So what naturally goes on the follow-up full length album? Well, probably the five crappy songs that WOULD HAVE gone the Whale Album. And because it's made of songs they wrote in the nine months since their Guppy Album came out, as opposed to songs they wrote in the three years they were together before that point, it's a bit rushed and frankly, they're just not as good.

What happens then? You know exactly what happens because it's happened a thousand times (and now a thousand and one times)-The critics say that the Guppy album was all about hype. The drummer gets depressed and moves his consumption up from a case of 12 ouncers to a case of pounders, the keyboard player skips down to South America because he can't stand dealing with the drummer anymore so he meets a hooker that's kind of nice but looks like Danzig and Coolio's love child, catches some awful VD and it doesn't look good for him because some amputation is going to be invovled (on several appendages), and the lead singer's dangerous libido was always kept in check by the keyboard player but now that he's in the hospital, the lead singer is sleeping with the manager's daughter (after the girlfriend threw him out) and she tells him the manager's been skimming and so the lead singer tells the guitar player and the guitar player thinks about those guys that own that dive out in Jersey, those guys who made them play that birthday party for their niece for her sweet sixteen and they said, after paying the band a handsome sum, 'If you ever need a favor...' and of course now they do. But the whole thing gets bungled and well...

...well you know the rest of the story anyways.

What does this have to do with us? Andrew is now in the hospital for 'undisclosed reasons'.

I'm kidding.

I tmentioned to Brian that we were thinking about releasing our Guppy album and he told me the above hypothesis. And then I started thinking about releasing a Whale album. Well, sure Red Collar have ten songs that COULD go on our Whale Album. But I/We don't really feel that it'd be really strong enough an album to make the great/good/pretty good/crap ratio. Maybe I'm being over critical and thinking too much about it but I figure that when I work my 9 to 5 job, I think a lot about the choices I make there so I should at least allow myself to be burdened with at least a little bit of wonderment concerning something I love. I don't think enough bands do allow themselves to be burdened and it results in mediocrity.

So we'll keep on writing and recording stuff at the house. Which leads me to another thought I had: Paul and Andrew are really new to the group and they have both significantly changed the way that songs are written even in the short duration that they've been with us...

...for the better I might add.

ep sleepy

We're currently recording some songs at Casa Kutchma. Paul has some great recording experience (and equipment) that allows us to at least try recording at home.  You can hear his solo project here:

http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=27636084

Amongst four other songs, we're re-recording Witching Hour with Paul and Andrew.  The previous Witching Hour (the one our myspace) was done without either of them and done with a whole lot of samples.  This new version that we're currently recording is closer to how we play it live. 

Except without the goats.

_______________________________________________________

Technology is good because it allows everyone to record whatever they want, whenever they want.  Technology is bad  because it allows everyone to record whatever they want, whenever they want.

I think every band goes through thinking whether they should record an EP or a full length or if they should record at all.  Nowadays, it's so cheap to record that I'm sure people (including myself at one point in the recent past) are compelled to release everything they write.  Bands will record all their songs in one long weekend or one long week and then put a name on it and call it an album.  Technology is nice that way because music becomes democratic.  When clubs ask for a demo, TA DA! there you go.  It's not just the popular and/or rich bands who get gigs but the unpopular and/or poor bands can too...as long as that demo sounds good.

But in a world before Garagebands and binary code, bands would have to really really save up for that one recording with that geeky looking guy with an earring and ponytail that smokes too much (and for some reason, he lives by the train tracks and has a lot of cats).  Bands would have to really think about what song they were going to record, maybe fight about it a little bit.  Maybe the bassist quits and they have to look for a new one and lo and behold in the aftermath the other band members never liked that bass player anyways and really, he was the one ruining that hit song. 

'Jeez, thank god we never recorded that album with him'.

So they get another bass player and then they'd maybe even rewrite the song to make it stronger and add in the new bass player's 'riffs' and then argue about it some more then once they all got it just right, they'd practice and practice and practice for that one recording because boy-oh-boy is it ever going to be expensive and we only got this one shot.  They'd play out in some crappy VFW and they'd see that the song they wanted to record doesn't go over so well with the kids, the sing-along isn't quite as sing-alongable as they thought.  And then they start the process over again.

'Jeez, that song wasn't as catchy as we thought.  Good thing we didn't record that one.'

Bands couldn't really afford to do a whole album.  They'd record a single then play out a little bit.  Write some more songs while discarding some of the old songs...some of the (okay I'll say it) bad songs.  And they'll save up a little more and go through the whole process over again for a new single.  And only bands that could afford to record, did record.  Maybe it was because their dad was a dentist or because the band was an active touring band, who knows.

So technology, for as much as it's done for bands, it's taken away too.  It's taken away a process of seperating the wheat from the chaff.  Everyone has four songs on myspace now, good or bad.   Those four slots must be filled.  For every good song a band has, they probably have at least one bad one up there.  And I'm sure in some people's opinions Red Collar's just as guilty as the next Joe Shmoe.

I don't really know what we're recording now is going to be-whether or not it's going to have some fancy schmancy cover art and then call it something so formal as an 'EP' remains to be seen. 

Wheat, chaff or Cheerios, I have no idea.  Holy shit, what a great title for an album.

Stay tuned,

j

 

305 South

We played a show this weekend at 305 South as part of the Durham3 Arts Series that's held in Durham.  We had a great time and met some really cool artists and saw some friends that we hadn't seen in awhile.  I asked each one of these friends if they had ever been to the venue before and they all replied 'No'. 

And then something strange happened.

Each one of them, as soon as they said 'No', immediately focused on something in 305 South, slacked their arms to their side, dropped their drink, got that faraway gaze in the eyes, and slowly started walking towards whatever thing it was that they were focused on (each thing was different for each person).  I didn't see them for the rest of the night presumably because once one thing gets you, the thing next to it will too, ad infinitum. Literally.  Some of them ae still there.  If you've ever been in 305 South, you know that there is a lot to look at and this blog isn't necessarily for you.

It's for everyone else.

Go check it out.  It's a fabulous space in downtown Durham on Dillard St. (as in 305 South Dillard Street).  The owners call it an anti-mall and that's about as good as a description as you can get.

http://www.305southdurham.com/

http://myspace.com/305south

If you've been to 305, list the thing that got your attention the first time.  If you've never been, go and come back here and let us know.  We'll wait for you.

j

 

A Dinosaur's Lifestyle v2.0

This was posted by Glenn from the 506 on the alt.chapel-hill site. According to Glenn, it's from a newsletter written by music industry 'analyst' (Glenn's quotes) Bob Lefsetz. Haven't researched what newletter it's from or anything but I think it's uberinteresting, urgent and worth the next six minutes of your life.

What Will Disappear:

Discs
It's going to happen sooner than you think. What with Apple
introducing a $149 Nano and a $69 Shuffle today. We've seen this movie again and again. Old wave technology holds its own, with slight erosion, and then CAVES! It happened in photography, it's going to happen in music. And the labels are just not ready for it. Oh, retail is. Every music retailer has either gone bankrupt or is letting its lease(s) expire or is diversifying greatly into other merchandise. As for Best Buy, Wal-Mart, etc, it was NEVER about the music. They can survive fine without it. They'll find something else to give away below cost to get people in the store. But, record labels...they're fucked.

Napster
Blame it on Microsoft, who can never get software right until the third iteration.

Blame it on the major labels. Who didn't see downloading AHEAD of time and push rental.

But don't blame it on the people. The people want to own music. After all, what's more valuable than your favorite tunes?

Music On Terrestrial Radio
You can't compete with iPods and commercial free music on satellite. Radio will go talk. Its local flavor being what saves it from going belly-up completely.

Music On MTV

Wait, it's ALREADY gone. Give up the ghost, MTV only plays videos so you'll give them talent to use in their promotions. They'd eviscerate it completely if they could, it gets HORRIBLE ratings. Music video, which will be sans major production in most cases, will be a Net form.

Stereos

Actually, for the under-thirty set, they've ALREADY gone.

Music is portable. That's the main place you hear it, on the run. Except for when it emanates from your computer, whether through speakers attached directly to it or via bridges that throw the sound around your house.

You doubt me? Check out a dorm room. Go to a store and try to buy two-channel, even at a HIGH END shop.

Long Term Recording Contracts

Hell, they're already dying in the U.K. The majors LICENSE a record or two and end up with NOTHING!

It's gonna be like the movie business. Everybody's a free agent, nobody's locked up for a long time. Except to THEMSELVES!

THIS is what the Net is bringing us. THIS is why the majors are fighting Net distribution so hard. If you can be on an indie and get paid...shit, what do you need the major for?

Furthermore, those contracts that are signed will be more equitable to the artist and clearer and shorter.

______________________________________________

What Will Appear:

Clubs

Nothing replaces the out of the home experience. This dancing and drugging to prerecorded tracks isn't gonna go on forever. People want live music. It will start locally, in small places, and grow from there. People want to see the acts they've read about/and heard on the Net. The Net is a conduit to LIVE, not to traditional major labels.

Careers
It's gonna be hard to break someone, but once they've been established, they're gonna be here for good. Because the fans that supported them on the way up, who built them, who sold their story, won't abandon them because they believe they've got an investment. It's THEIR band, not the MEDIA'S!

A Ton Of Music

Do you remember the one album, three year, five single paradigm?

I don't give a fuck if your album has five singles anymore. The correct parlance is five HITS! You'll release a steady stream of product, building investment in the band. Dividends will pay off not only in sale of this music(as part of a bundle, not as single tracks on iTunes), but touring, merchandising... Fans will give you ALL their money.

As for singles artists... It will be the early seventies all over again. You can run a track up Top Forty radio, but you can't make any real money. Hell, the only reason the labels could make real money selling tracks in the past decade was because you HAD to buy the complete album to hear them. Those days are THROUGH!

Powerful Managers

Gatekeepers of talent. That's what the major labels thought they were. In the nineties all the mid-level managers went to work for the labels and the company dictated to those that were left, even the big powerhouses had to deal with "corporate policy". No more. The manager will be king once again.

A Final Price For Tickets

Once the dinosaurs slow down, and the business has to WORK for live revenue, it's going to be scary. Developing new talent is the first criterion for health, but the next will be consumer trust. The final cost of a ticket will be clear. The public will demand it. The days of ordering a $25 ticket that turns out to be $40 are coming to an end. It's gonna be $40. Actually lower, since the ruse will have been revealed.

Attorney Strength

These weasels will just adjust their loyalty to the managers from the labels.

First we kill all the lawyers?

Sounds good to me. They don't write the music, why should they have such guaranteed tenures/incomes? The problem is too many of today's lawyers are loyal to the label before the act, since the label will survive and the act won't. This is truly heinous.

New Blood

Right now there's some twentysomething sleeping on a mattress, working on sweat equity, who's going to be the new king of this business.Actually, a FEW! Just like Steve Jobs and Bill Gates stole computermthunder from IBM, these guys will decimate the old players. Mainframes are history. Replaced by localized PCs (or PCs strung up in parallel!) Think of the music business the same way. As something DECENTRALIZED!

Cowboy Hats and Hemorroids *Part 2:Adults Only*

If the 'Part 2:Adults Only' of the title hasn't clued you in, there is a first part to this. Read that first. Do this now.

Glad to have you back!

My Dad did a song called 'Tequila Makes Her Clothes Fall Off' at Karaoke. You get an A if you guessed it's a country song, a B if you guessed it's a Jimmy Buffet song and you get sent to the corner if you didn't have to guess, you already knew.

I would've loved if Beth instantly turned into a mirror so I could see the look on my face. See, the look on my face was not due to the fact that my Dad was doing a song with a lewd title like that or the fact that he dedicated the song to my Mom or the fact that my Mom got up to dance while he's singing the song or the fact that, due to my Dad's slurring and hesitation, I'm not quite positive he's ever heard the song before or he was just wasted. None of that is what caused the shock/awkwardness that must have been on my face.

The look on my face was because my Dad requested to sing a Contemporary Country Western Song.

I couldn't believe he ever heard this song before. As far as I knew, my Dad listens to classical. Or The Last of the Mohicans Soundtrack. Growing up, I remember listening to Oldies. My Mom is a big Elvis fan and my Dad is a big Credence fan. I remember listening to a fair share of the Oldies station in Johnstown. As a side note, does every city have a 'Sunny 101'? Actually, maybe it's 100.7 and they round up. I think in every city I've ever been in, the radio station 'Sunny' is always 'Sunny 101'. Even in London, England. And Kibera, Africa. Maybe it was 'Froggy 101' in London. Maybe it was 'Dreary 101' in London. Is there a 'Cloudy 101' or 'Partly Sunny 101'? Anyways...

As I write this, I'm really trying to focus on if I heard country growing up and yes, now I remember watching the Mandrel Sisters TV variety show and I remember seeing Dolly Parton and Crystal Gayle on some kind of TV variety show. Hee-Haw maybe? I don't know. I don't remember Conway Twitty or Merle Haggard or Charlie Pride. Why do I remember the women? The answer's probably obvious.

So, in reflection, maybe I shouldn't be so shocked that my Dad was doing 'Tequila Makes Her Clothes Fall Off'. But I am still shocked at the popularity of the music at this bar in Pennsylvania. Johnstown Pennsylvania. Blue Collar. Democrat. A real true Rust White and Blue town. And then I started thinking about it, by 'it' I mean the popularity of country music even though as I mentioned in Part 1, it's a pretty poor place to look if you're looking for soul.

It's wear the other shoe time, kids.

If I was an Adult not interested in new Rock music, if I haven't been interested in mining record stores since the 60's, if I am that perfect age when as a youth you relied on the radio and what the radio hath brought was good and if I still rely on the radio for new music, any NEW music, what would I listen to? I may be looking for something refreshing, at least refreshing to someone who sees that Michael Bolton cut his hair, Patrick Swayze just Dirty Saunters, Elton John honeymoons and refuses seven figure offers from Disney and Broadway yet Phil Collins takes the same offers at six figures (not true by the way), and Kenny G, where for art thou? What would I listen to?

Of course I'd listen to 'Tequila Makes Her Clothes Fall Off' because I kinda don't have a choice. It's a little edgy, it's not old-fashioned but it's not R&B edgy. It's enough to cause you to blush a little but not racy enough for me to pick up a protest sign and help Bill O'Reilly boycott Pepsi (even though it says the same thing in a different way). What else is there in the Radio Wasteland for Adults? Music like Oh, Brother Where Art Thou-The Remixes? Santana & Friends of Friends? Duets with Pat Boone? None of that is released on a consistant basis so that Adults can feel part of a movement like they can with country music (being part of a movement is important to everyone). It's interesting because every time I think about the damaging effects of radio, it's always been about 'the kids' being force fed Brittney Lohan Simpson or whoever is the Lady of the Year. I'm over talking about radio in respect to 'the kids' but I never ever thought about the damaging effect of radio on 'the parents'. And believe me, this could be a whole lot worse. They could've been Steve Miller fans. Or Foreigner.

I talked with parents about this whole thing till we wee hours of the morning that cold single digit February Morn in Johnstown.

My Dad said, 'I like that Green Guy.'

'Al Green?'

'No. Well I like him but that's not who I'm thinking of.'

'Mo Green, from the Godfather?'

'Nooo! It's that guy who sang on Seinfeld.'

'Lorene Greene was on Seinfeld? Didn't he die?'

'No it's a new group. That guy, you know, he sings those faster songs but not this one'

'Green Day.'

('Time of Your Life'-birthsong of the Popular albeit Irritating and Lazy Musical Montage in every episode of every series on television since the Seinfeld goodbye. Please LOST, stop doing musical montages!)

'That's it! I like that song he sings on Seinfled but I've never heard anything else he's done. So that doesn't mean I'm a country fan just because I like that song I sang tonight.'

Yeah. Maybe. But for now Beth, you can change back from being a mirror. The look should not have been as shocking as I thought. Will my parents start watching NASCAR? Will they vote Republican? Will they start wearing cowboy hats? Stay tuned for the startling conclusion.

(****FOR MY PARENTS ONLY*****)

Please please please do not become Parrotheads. I'm so so proud that you have not become Parrotheads.

Cowboy Hats and Hemorroids *Part 1:Karaoke*

Beth and I drove up to Pennsylvania this past weekend. The night before we left, we went to a bar with my parents for some Karaoke. There was the usual fare: Just a Gigolo, Sweet Caroline, I Got You Babe and I'm sure by the end of the night someone did Paradise By the Dashboard lights. I wondered why most of the usual suspects have to be so goddamn long. Once, my buddy did Kashmir. The DJ cut him off. Then again, that same friend has been kicked out of every Karaoke bar we've ever been in. He's accidently broken microphones, dropped guitar props the DJ brings, dropped his drawers. Good times, good times.

Permission is given to all DJ to keep songs to under 3 minutes. There, now I'll never have to hear Me and Bobby McGee again.

I got increasing frustrated, bored and angry as the night went on. See, those few songs I mentioned bookended a very long night of country music tunes. I''ll state now that I don't have a bias against country music. I like Hank Williams and Willie Nelson. Johnny Cash, sure. Patsy Cline, yes. My brother and I used to play all those songs as a kid. It's this 'new' kind of country that bothers me. The 'rock and roll' kind of country. The 'suck-ass' kind of country.

I really thought about why I hate it so much (we were in the bar for four hours or so, plenty of time). I was driving so I wasn't drinking but I did do a lot of thinking. Here's why I hate it:

Go to the Keyboard section of Radio Shack or Best Buy. Most entry level keyboards have this ability where you hit a button and a drum beat plays. You want to hit the *Country* Button. Do this now. Good. Now look for an *Accompanyment* Button (or something like it). This button allows a whole symphony of bass, keyboard and, in this case, a lap steel if your keyboard is advanced enough. If the keyboard is cheesy enough, it'll even throw in some horns. Casio's always do this. Find this *Accompanyment* button and hit it now. Excellent. Gold star. Now hit a note on the left end of the keyboard. You should hear some climbing bass, a blast of horns and the beginning of each measure and some subtle keys in the background that may swell at the end of each measure. Can you hear that? Hopefully you do.

This, gentle ladies and gentle men, is the backing music for every top 10 country music tune from, say, 1986 to present. Listen carefully when those tunes come on CMT or on the adult contemporary station you listen to. It's there.

Don't try and pass the Casio *Accompanyment* off in Rock or Jazz or Blues or R&B or *gasp* Swing. It doesn't work. When you try and play these genres of songs using the preprogrammed Casio keyboard method, it doesn't sound like a legitimate hit like it does in country music, it sounds like preprogrammed Casio keyboards. But again...

...it does work for country.

Go to Karaoke and request an Elvis song or CCR. I recommend Trouble from Elvis or Fortunate Son from the brothers Fogerty. Go ahead. Hear the background track? It doesn't sound rough enough. You can recognize the song, that decending guitar lick from Credence, but it still sounds like a Karaoke track. It doesn't have the oomph, the soul, the dirt, the something that makes rock, well, rock. It sounds like it was done with the top of the line Casio keyboard. Too processed. But listen to those Garth Brooks songs. Don't request one, for the love of Gene Autry. Someone will, probably 'Friends in Low Places'. Hear that? My God, it sounds exactly like album. Now ask to sing 'Crazy' or 'Ring of Fire'. This one you CAN request. Don't worry. They have them. From the first note, you know this ain't the Tennessee Three. But was that Garth Brooks' backing band a few tracks ago? Maybe. Coulda been.

I'm looking forward to hearing what Rick Rubin does with the Dixie Chicks, but this whole reasoning is why I hate country music. Hate it. It's not the 'country' part of the country music that I mind. It's the 'music' part. I'm sure the lyrics are fine and heartfelt and all red white and blue. The singers are talented. Hell, I know the musicians that actually play the backing music are talented. So why isn't it better? Why does it sound prepackaged? If they love the USA so much, why does the music sound like came from a keyboard Made in Japan? Is this a statement against rock and roll? A subversive self-hatred from the Heartland? Why does it have to be as anti-soul as possible?

I'd ask Garth myself but I'm sure he's too busy counting his money from that Wal Mart deal:

http://www.planetgarth.com/news/article.php?cid=01181

They're a perfect match.

j

HERE WE GO GILMORE, HERE WE GO *CLAP CLAP*

I rooted for the Steelers because I'm from Johnstown PA. I'm a fan, I screamed, yelled at the TV. That being said, I'm going to competely trash sports for the next couple of minutes.

I can see why sports are good for kids-encourages self-esteem, develops the physicality of a person, teaches teamwork to acheive a common goal, the usual Phys Ed talk everyone at some point hears. To be fair, I can also see the downside: if there's winners, there's losers and if someone's picked first then someone's picked last and for every Pittsburgh there's a Cleveland.

But none of this is really my concern. I don't like sports because of a certain aspect of society that involves sports fans. I won't say that I don't like sports fans, because I'm one of them, I may not be a rabid fan but to each his own I say. But there's just a certain aspect of sports that I don't like. See what you think of this recent conversation I heard in the Waffle House the other day (names have been withheld):

"Boy, we looked real good out there. Real good. Nobody's gonna stop us this year. Good thing ________ came back this year to help us out. We're gonna look even better next year, definitely better than ________."

To show you the big deal of the last over-heard conversation, let me rewrite it, with emphasis on certain words:

"Boy, WE looked real good out there. Real good. Nobody's gonna stop US this year. Good thing ________ came back this year to help US out. WE'RE gonna look even better next year, definitely better than ________."

WE. US.

I have a funny feeling that if the fellow who stated the above died from getting hit by a nuclear shit bomb, _______ would be able to carry on just fine without him. I can see how it's important to community to rally around a team, get together for some franks and beans and watch the game and all that. Certainly people can argue that the fans DO make a difference out there (and they do). So I'll go along with the pro-sports person with all of this. We've all heard this and some of us have been annoyed by it. I admit it's not the most original observation ever but read on.

Let's say I loved the Gilmore Girls. LOVED them. I got Gilmore Girls Posters and Gilmore Girls buttons and the cereal that I eat has one of the Gilmore Girls on and she's on a TV commercial with a big toothy grin saying 'Breakfast of Champions' and I get Gilmore Girls shaved into the side of my head, I name my child Gilmore, I get my car all painted in Gilmore Girls colors (I don't know what they would be, so don't ask) and me and my buddies get together to watch it a the house and we have a cookout and we make cupcakes with the letter GG on them and then I go to the Waffle House and I say to the fellow who's in the booth next to me:

"Did you see us on TV last night? We looked good, didn't we? Good thing Alexis Bledel came back this year, huh? I bet West Wing's real scared now. Yup, real scared. I think we'll be in the top 30 of the Neilsen's this week. They're gonna make a movie out of us, I hear."

This is certainly ridiculous and it's the big reason I don't like sports: because it is acceptable to do this in sports but for those poor slobs who get dressed up for Star Trek conventions or Star Wars premiere's or comic book conventions, it's an object of ridicule. At least the Sci-Fi folk don't do it week in and week out like people do for football. Or go grocery shopping in a Darth Vader uniform like people do in their football jerzees. Or work the seafood counter in a yoda uniform.

"Excuse me, kind I get one of the lobsters there. Right up against the glass. That one, the big one. Bet that one's good, huh?"

"Size matters not, ... Look at me. Judge me by size, do you? You must feel The Force around you. Everywhere. Even between the deli counter and the produce."

 

j

marv

This article-

http://movies.msn.com/movies/oscars2006/snubs?GT1=7782

reminded me of Mickey Rourke in Sin City. I sincerely agree that he should've been nominated. Maybe for the Academy voters the film was too cartoony or considered not a serious arty flick, but as far as someone who really inhabited a role and really created something, I thought he was amazing, literally the role he was born to play. I've been a huge fan of his though since Diner and Pope of Greenwich Village and I'll root for the guy when his movies come out at least until I see the movie (Get Carter...stay away).

Could anyone else have done that role? Not anyone current. Lee Marvin would have been excellent but he would've had to bulk up a hell of a lot more. Maybe Robert Mitchum.

And seriously, enough with Dame Judi Dench. Should've gone with Maria Bello in 'A History of Violence'. But again, it was based on a comic book so maybe the Academy thought by giving William Hurt the nod, that's enough.

j

Academy Awards

I can't believe 'A History of Violence' and 'The Squid and the Whale' were not nominated for more. Actually I can believe it, I just don't want to. I still have to see 'Good Night and Good Luck', somewhere, if it's still out.

Junebug was an okay film. I'm rooting for Amy Adams mainly cause it's based and filmed in Carolina, even though I thought she was pretty flaky. I understand that's how the character is supposed to be but I thought it was a little too much. Still, it's nice to see such a 'small' film on that list. Haven't seen North Country but I thought Michelle Williams was pretty spectacular in Brokeback. so my heart's with Amy Adams but my head's with Michelle Williams.

Philip Seymour Hoffman will win for Capote but my vote would not be for him. If we'd see the results, Jaoquin Phoenix would be second. I wouldn't vote for either and last year I wouldn't have voted for Jaime Fox. They imitated some famous person perfectly fine but not to knock their performances because again they did a great job, I think it's a lot harder to create a character from just a few words on the page like Heath Ledger in Brokeback or Laura Linney and Jeff Daniels in The Squid and the Whale.

More on all this later.

j

brokeback

there's only one reason i hate multiplexes. some people hate them because of the impersonal nature or the prices of a soft drink or how the particular movies they are showing are ruining society. understand these arguements are all relative to the 'art house'.

the only reason i hate multiplexes is because people talk during the movies. i try and go during the week for this reason but occassionally i make it out on a weekend. it's usally an awful an experience and i don't know why i punish myself but everytime i keep on thinking, 'please lord, let this time be different'. my experience with wolf creek was awful. i remember seeing hannibal and the experience was worse than that. i think people get nervous and uncomfortable with horror movies and they feel like they have to act like they're cool and collected when probably the opposite is true.

when people laugh at an art house, it's especially depressing. like, if you go to mcdonald's and you hear someone burp, you kind of expect it. you take a nice deep breath before you go into the bathrooms because, hey, it's mcdonalds. but at a five star restaurant, you take your time, check yourself in the mirror, straighten out the tie. you have a better experience at least partially because the people eating there are more considerate.

i had a really terrible experience last night during brokeback mountain. but it wasn't at a multi-plex, it was at the rialto in raleigh. some moron acting like they're the only person in the movie theater. i'm guessing they act like this for the same reason people act like they do during horror films. i'm not trying to say films with gay characters are equivalent to horror films or anything...just bear with me.

this jackass would laugh at everything in the movie like it was jim carrey and charlie chaplin all alone for the summer, rounding up sheep and not heath and jake.

heath kicks over a can of beans BWHA HA. jake pees in the woods HARDY HAR. this was all stuff to try and give a lightheartedness to the flick, it's not supposed to be 'meet the parents' or 'there's something about mary'. but there's this idiot laughing away.

i asked a friend of mine if they saw anything recently and he said he saw brokeback and thought it was good but the experince was terrible because of people laughing.

this tends to happen with british comedies too. i had a similar experience with 'love actually' at the chelsea in chapel hill. i think it happens with british comedies because some things are more hilarious to british people than americans. it's not that big of a deal, just a cultural thing. but these 'refined' pricks come to watch 'love actually' and to prove that they really get british humor they laugh loud and they laugh often just to make sure something doesn't fall through the cracks, making sure to let the rest of us know they get it. they get british humor. they're smart. they can appreciate different cultures. they're hoping you come up to them afterwards and ask them about certain parts and why they were funny and they'll point out they lived in J.O.E. for a summer (that's what they call it! get it! jolly old england!) when the reality is, everyone wants to flush their head down a toilet while wondering if it's so goddamn funny over there, why didn't you stay? i know of at least fifty people who will gladly pitch in a few bucks for airfare to get you back to the Queen Mum.

i think that's what happened last night at the rialto. it wasn't someone who was laughing because they are ignorant, it was someone laughing because they were trying to prove they aren't.

and that's even worse.

j

Hostel

I went to see Hostel last night with my brother. Good movie. I enjoyed the off-balance of Cabin Fever more, but it's pretty good.

I have a theory about horror movies. Genre flicks come in packs- a couple years ago, the Teen flick had a resurrgence fifteen years after the flames of the Brat Pack and Hughes movies fanned out. Not sure why the Teen phenomenon happened, but the Disaster movies started appearing in the very late 90's. Some guess that it's a Hollywood Studio Thing-Studio A is producing a disaster movie and Studio B hears about it and needs their own disaster movie to compete with in the same summer. Since both Disaster movies are greenlight, other Studios start stepping up to the trough. My guess that Disaster Movies had a resurrgence is because of pre-millenium tension. Audiences consciously or subconsciously wanted to see the a hero save us from the End.

Now, it seems that there are a lot of big budget horror films that are coming out and are not going straight to video. Again, I haven't scientifically studied this, but the original Texas Chainsaw came out in '74, Friday the 13th came out in '80. I think there is a resurgence in Horror Movies when there is a Republican president. Well, maybe there isn't a resurrgence in the number of horror movies released but there is a resurrgence in the public's response to horror movies.

I'll see you at 'The Hills Have Eyes',
j